Have you seen this penguin?

I remember a time when I used to be a happy child. Moments such as these were not uncommon. My penguins and I used to be inseperable.



But one day, I awoke to a terrible surprise. Perhaps it was that I had been at the Derby too long. Or maybe I should not have accepted that kidney donation from Pac-Man after all. Whatever it was, I was feeling a bit nauseous. The loves of my life, my precious penguins, were missing. I was lost and had nowhere to go. I could no longer hide my shame. I was exposed as the fraud, the deviant as some may say, that I really was.



Days later, I received the most shocking news of all: the legendary Imposter was behind it all. The one who had befriended my Guin and I had turned to be our foe. Not only had he kidnapped the Guin, but he also had run off with my football and my prized hat. In the ultimate act of defiance, he wore it in an inverted fashion and cocked slightly off center.



Although I couldn't prove it at the time, I also suspected that this strange-looking fellow may have played some role in this affair as well:



In any case, the future of the Guin that I had sworn to protect would now be in the hands of my rather keen gumshoeing abilities. My goal was to find him at all costs. I was to take no prisoners.

To be continued...